Yesterday some moron from Missouri made our lives miserable, made thousands of people’s lives miserable, got a passenger in his car minorly mauled and caused a major environmental catastrophe.
If you live in Minnesota you probably know what I’m talking about. A man driving on Route 94 out by Alberville missed his exit. Thinking that his time was more important than anyone else’s time (or lives) he pulled a nice slow u-turn with his underpowered suburban station wagon, crossing the path of an oncoming gasoline tanker. He took out the tanker. Thousands of gallons of gasoline were spilled on the median, and traffic on 94, which is the main transportation artery in the area, was shut down in both directions for nine hours.
Amanda and I were driving towards the airport from up north to pick up Julia who was expected back from Washington DC. We were not on that highway, but rather, ten miles away or so on the parallel highway to which all of the end-of-weekend traffic was diverted. (We don’t have a lot of roads in Minnesota, comparatively.) For hours.
Warning to Minnesotans and anyone who comes to Minnesota over the next few weeks: The State Patrol has vowed to crack down on this particular violation over coming weeks.
So go ahead. Make our day …
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Wow, such a stupid idea. I know someone who had to have her whole face reconstructed and her boyfriend died when he tried a similar time-saving u-turn.
A couple of points:
1.) “Moron from Missouri” is redundent.
2.) Give the driver a Darwin Award, and a hearty thanks for improving the breed through removal of what is clearly a defective decision-making gene form the gene pool.
The driver survived, free to spread his genetic material all across states starting in the letter M.
I see morons like that every day; my truckie buddies tell me they see thousands of them every day. There’s no shortage of idiots who are happy to kill people in an attempt to save 1 or 2 minutes.