What Happened on that JetBlue Flight?

This is the second time this–airline employee freaking about 911 and/or Iran–has happened in recent days, the first time being with a flight attendant.

As mentioned in that report, JetBlue lost another flight attendant in August, 2010 for apparently different reasons:

Only in Boston would you find a Helocoptah.

Please enter your best stab and conspiracy riddled explanation for these events below.

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11 thoughts on “What Happened on that JetBlue Flight?

  1. Okay, this is not quite a “conspiracy theory”, but how about this for wild speculation: Maybe this sort of thing (complete nervous breakdown of a member of the flight crew) actually happens all the time — long schedules, lack of sleep, being literally and figuratively “ungrounded” by all the travel… and maybe we are just hearing about it now because of a combination between the cultural zeitgeist and cell phone cameras: A guy telling you a story about how one time the pilot of the plane he was on started yelling about Sasquatch in the middle of the flight would be interesting, but hardly national news. Change that to a cellphone video of the pilot ranting about al Qaeda, and it’s a whole different story.

    Hey, you asked for conspiracy theories, you got one!

  2. That was the Boston broadcast, but the “helocoptah” is a New York/New Jersey accent. It hurts my Bostonian ears.

  3. It’s aliens!! Infecting the brains of Jet Blue employees. Because aliens hate the color blue. That’s why they never anal probe anyone wearing the color blue — it’s like kryptonite to them.

    I always wear something blue whenever I’m in the back woods of Arkansas or other places where aliens do their abducting and anal probing. You should too.

    BTW: This is also where the tradition of brides wearing something blue started. Aliens LOVE the color white. White is like crack to aliens. So they started abducting brides until someone gave a bride something blue — and they didn’t get abducted.

  4. There exists a super- secret organization sponsored by Greyhound Bus that is slipping some sort of psychotic drug to airline employees. When more episodes start happening, travelers will eschew flight and start taking the bus again.
    Don’t believe it? Go downtown after midnight and see how many people are hanging around the old bus depot. They are disguised as the homeless, but they are really renovating the place in anticipation of the Greyhound revival.

  5. I think jamessweet’s speculation is on the right track (insofar as I can estimate any speculation, my own included, is on to something). Contemporary air travel in the Western world (for lack of a better term) is a confluence of many stressful factors. My sister was a flight attendant for many years with a now-defunct airline. She loved the job, but as a service industry job, many of its stresses are publicly accessible (that is, readily on display in the environment in which the job occurs).

    The service job of flight attendants means dealing with planes full of people who are collectively seated in confined space for extended periods of time, subjected to a long and sometimes undignified security processing, denied amenities often available as baseline service for many airlines in previous decades (I’m thinking of the 1980s specifically), declining standards of customer service, subject to delay and cancellation (these are often beyond control or blame, but there sure seems to be a marked psychological reaction to them), affected by both memory of actual terrorist events as well as media reporting (both accurate and inaccurate) about additional possible events, and compounded by whatever additional stresses they have in their lives outside of the flight (on my way to a funeral, just found out my contract won’t be renewed after this trip to the job site, headed to Mayo clinic for cancer treatment, fear of flight, etc.). Many passengers and airline staff may also be firmly and comfortably rooted in various aspects of privilege and react negatively to perceived outgroup members or not enough “recognition” of their sense of entitlement.

    My sister also reported that on many flights, some passengers either arrived tipsy, or proceeded to ingest (or at least request) sufficient purchased alcohol that could result in dramatically lowered behavioral inhibitions. Airlines can refuse to allow drunk or belligerent passengers to board, but there are incidents where passengers arrive sober (or sober-ish) and then make every effort to reach their final destination of drunk-and-loud or drunk-and-indignant.

    Lastly, in my sister’s case ([understatement] and I have this sneaking suspicion that it has happened to many women in that job [/understatement]), there was never any shortage of jackasses eager to earn their demerit badge in sexual harassment.

    Throw in media attention on international events, add a dash of readily available multi-media portable platforms in the hands of passengers, and put in the oven of 24-7 internet/television media display until done.

    What we need are some statistics: number of these kinds of incidents now vs., say 10, 20, and 30 years ago, controlling for things such as travel times, presence/absence of alcohol/drug use, demographics, geography, carrier, circumstances of delay (if any), so forth. It may be a case of “Crime rates have declined, but media reporting of crime has increased and become more sensationalized such that public perception of crime does not match the reality.” Maybe there were “good old days” of air travel, I just don’t know.

    Still learning,


  6. The on board machinery that produces the chemtrails is aging and starting to leak the crazy chemicals in amounts too high for people who spend so much time on the planes.

  7. Oh you poor poor deluded fools!

    This is clearly a plot by Tonie Christie and the City of Amarillo to get people to visit. They “Hire” a Pilot to go “Crazy” at the right point in the flight, and then the plane HAS to be diverted to the nearest city which is Amarillo. Hospital? More like Airport Pilot’s Lounge for a Brandy to Celebrate another load of customers!

    This solves the major problem of Amarillo’s Tourism which is that Amarillo is harder to get to than Narnia.

    After all. Since time immemorial people have been asking the question…

    “Is This The Way to Amarillo?”

    I even have a youtube link of british soldiers asking about the way to Amarillo. A YOUTUBE LINK! You Must Believe Me! I have Proof! PROOOF!!!

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