Michele Bachmann: It will NOT ‘get better’ if I can help it!


“It isn’t that some gay will get some rights. It’s that everyone else in our state will lose rights. For instance, parents will lose the right to protect and direct the upbringing of their children …. They will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.”

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39 thoughts on “Michele Bachmann: It will NOT ‘get better’ if I can help it!

  1. Uh-oh. You caught us. We evil Canadians have been poisoning the great lakes with our Miraculous Stupidity Potion for the past century.

    The U.S. has no idea we’ve contaminated their water supply.

    This article just proves it’s working…

  2. Wait, I’m sorry, I missed the part of the constitution that put one’s right to shelter his or her child from reality above other people’s civil rights.

  3. She raises an excellent point. With all the curriculum standards teachers must get to during the year, there really is no time teach the finer aspects of stroking another man’s cock or licking another woman’s clitoris. I mean teachers can’t cut into the time devoted to varsity letterman date rape or studies in blowjobs. How will traditional families survive?!?!

  4. In a way, it’s encouraging that someone with her obvious mental deficiency can be successful in life. Sure, it’s only politics, a world in which being disgruntled counts as a qualification, but still.

  5. my sister once met her at a place she worked. she said bachmann seemed a little “off” and “unpleasant.”

    this was several years ago, before she was in the spotlight.

  6. As a resident of the Minnesota 6th Congressional District, I have repeatedly apologized. Now I discover that it’s actually the fault of the Canadians and their Miraculus Stupidity Potion. I feel better. Thanks for ‘fessing up, Janice.

  7. Someone is projecting her own actions onto others and fearing that she will be treated the same way. See the results of a simple word substitution:

    “It isn’t that some Christians will get some rights. It’s that everyone else in our state will lose rights. For instance, parents will lose the right to protect and direct the upbringing of their children …. They will be required to learn that Christianity is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching Christianity.”

    Basically, all this has already happened, and the attitude is that this is just and right.

  8. “Four titties is better than two wee wee’s but it is still immorral, sinful, and just downright freakish. hompathic tendencies suck.”

    Maybe you should learn to spell first before you post your inane crap here.
    The standard rule is: the more homophobic, the more in the closet.
    Think about that before posting your tripe.

  9. @ Darrel
    as an idiot, you are simply amazing.

    “The more Godophobic, the more religuous you are in secret. fair enough?”

    How can I fear something that doesn’t exist?

    As a troll – you are just below average. As a poe – you really suck.

    Can you explain what homopathic anal sex is?
    I know of anal sex, both homosexual and heterosexual.
    But homopathic?
    Is that sex in dilution? And when, at what c?

  10. Darel/Darrel/Darrell cannot seem to spell his own name the same way twice. Makes me think; Poe.

    But as may be: he might have a point about Judgment day. Let’s examine what Jesus said about homosexuals:

    ” . . . “.

    Now let’s examine what Jesus said about holding others in moral contempt before God:

    “Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel.”
    (Editor’s note: That’s a pun, in Aramaic. Apparently Jesus had a sense of humor, or at least the people who made him up, did.)

    “Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess. Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also. Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness.”

    Gee, sounds like “The more homophobic, the more in the closet”, to me. But you seem to have an image of Judgment day in which God turns to you and thanks you for minding the store. How fortunate for you!

    And what did Jesus say about Judgment day?

    “Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment…”

    And before you go quoting Deuteronomy and the Pauline epistles, look at who’s name is on the religion – your religion, supposedly.

    In practice, hatred and fear are almost the same thing.

  11. “He’s a real live right winger”

    A teabagger par excellence, a combination of a cranial cavity filled with slogans, half-remembered phrases, hot air and the circuitry to somehow operate – however faulty and inefficiently – the keyboard of a computer.

    “Sorry about my spelling”

    You should be sorry, unless english is sl.
    And don’t blame your school. You do not need school to learn how to read and write the language of your country properly.
    That is just the poor excuse of the intellectual lazy arsehole you are a representative of.

  12. Aw gawsh – fust we gi’ ’em niggas “freedum” an’ we lose our plantations. Now dey wants us ter recognize dem homer simpsons as people – we’s goin’ ter lose our christianity!

    Why do you Minnesotans keep voting for that mad cow?

  13. “all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.”

    How would that be even possible? Our school, right now, can’t even teach heterosexuality correctly. How are all schools to suddenly acquire the ability to teach homosexuality? Especially to the point that a) the students will be taught that it is something they should try and b) the teaching will be so thorough as to eliminate a parent’s ability to pass on their bigoted ways!

    I really find arguments like this very scary. Firstly because it is so clearly illogical. It is just a flawed argument. Secondly for what it says about Bachmann. I am forced to conclude that she either believes her words to be true (scary) or cares so little for her constituents that she is willing to play on their fears with comments like this (sad and scary).

  14. “No wonder China and the rest of the world has surpassed us in education.”

    China and the rest of the world that surpasses us in education accept and teach evolution.

  15. Michelle Bachman opens her mouth and says something stupid…., sorry people, this is not news, it happens EVERY time she opens her mouth. Nothing to see, move on.

    She would be well advised not to ever visit the Netherlands or the Czech Republic; her miniscule brain would explode.

    “..all schools will begin teaching homosexuality””. Well thank Dog, at least American kids will be able to learn something about at least one type of sex.

    Will there be practical exams?

  16. Schools should not be allowed to even mention this lifestyle choice. No wonder China and the rest of the world has surpassed us in education.

    You might find it interesting to see how many countries who surpass the US in education also allow same-sex marriage.

    Like your neighbour to the north, for instance.

  17. Dumbass Darrel’s deity doesn’t exist.

    Wow, that almost alliterated.

    Anyway, it’s funny how you troglodyte morons like to ignore actual scientific evidence that goes against your claims, and it’s funny how you like to use a 2000-year-old book written by addled, scientifically-illiterate shepherds with hallucinations to try to support your stupidity. Here’s a hint, moron: the buy-bull and other religious texts aren’t peer-reviewed nor do they check out in experimentation. Why, do you suppose, creobot institutions such as the Disco ‘Tute are widely derided and not used as scientific expertise? Because they’re not scientific, they’re bullshit.

    (And this ‘gawdophobe’ business? You’re conjecturing that there’s actually a deity for us to fear. We can’t fear something that doesn’t exist. Though if your deity did exist, he’d be a petulant little shit.)

    Oh, did you know AIDS is more prevalent among heterosexuals?

    I suspect you’re so homophobic because you think they’re going to come and convert you. Maybe I should find out who you are and send a shipment of twinks to your door and you can try to resist them, but you’ll probably end up thinking ‘Mmm, what lithe little bodies they have!’ or something, if I know how homophobes usually turn out to behave in secret.

    Go fuck a sheep, since apparently you idiots think that’s more okay than fucking a consenting human no matter what their sex is. Though remember, ‘baa’ doesn’t necessarily mean ‘yes’. I hear banjos coming from your direction and I don’t know why some people around you aren’t paddling.

  18. . At least it is not in my 1945 dictionary

    your logic is impeccable. A word you created is valid, because….you created it.
    A word in present day dictionaries is invalid because it does not show up in a 1945 dictionary. I guess therefore neither the space shuttle nor the internet exists among a few thousand other things.

    A measure of your intellectual prowess, for sure.

    “Global warming is a hoax, extortion and is a crime”

    I guess the evidence of vanishing ice cover in the north west passage, vanishing permafrost in Canada’s north, rising sea levels, receding glaciers, falling pH in the oceans, rising CO2 is all a hoax. And therefore logically you believe in a sky fairy because: the absence of evidence.

    I am astonished your brain can control the rest of your bodily functions.

  19. “Why do you Minnesotans keep voting for that mad cow?”

    It’s the Sixth District. It’s a gerrymandered exurban/rural monstrosity filled with half-literate Republican white megachurchers whose parents moved there decades earlier when the Twin Cities started getting more black and brown faces. Lots and lots of Ayn Rand worshipers who think they’re Christians but instead follow the perverted social Darwinism of the (ironically enough) atheist Rand.

    I know a guy who refs soccer games; 75% of the games are in the Sixth, and it’s only there that he finds it necessary to tell loudmouthed parents and other alleged adults attending the games — many if not most have the obligatory fishes on their vehicles — not to cuss in front of children and hurl abuse at them. Inner-city parents, by contrast, are much better behaved.

  20. Wow, how did I miss Derrel’s China comment. I blame insomnia.

    Anyway, there are a lot of views people have that are pretty bad. Suicide bombings, homophobia, racism, etc. “Schools should not be allowed to even mention this lifestyle choice” has to be one of the worst because it falls into the category of “Schools should not be allowed to talk about [this thing which actually exists in the real world].”

    I bet dollars to donuts that Darrel would have no problems with schools “mention[ing] this lifestyle choice” if the mention involved Hell and burning and damnation and the way it is destroying marriage and this great christian country.

    @T. Bruce McNeely:
    But does Canada actually actively teach their children to go out and be gay, as the US is clearly going to be required to do?

  21. “as the US is clearly going to be required to do?”

    are you pulling that out of your arse or do you have actually references to cite?

  22. I live in the Minnesota 6th, and have repeatedly apologized for Michelle Bachmann. Many of us do our best, but have been unable to convince others that being seriously defective is a disqualification for elected office. Besides, it’s not our fault – Janice in Toronto confessed that it’s a Canadian plot up at #4 above.

  23. @peter
    I was going off of Bachmann’s statement at the beginning of the post. Did you even read this post? She clearly said “required.”

    @T. Bruce McNeely
    That looks like a great course. While I am sure it is not the Homosexuality 101 bachmann fears, I think it be close enough to answer my question.
    Also, please stop giving me more reasons to like Canada over the US. Moving is a pain in the butt.

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