How To Buy a Computer

I get email… In this case, virus-like but funny email. Pass it on…COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTTABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking about buying a computer.ABBOTT: Mac?COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.ABBOTT: Your computer?COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.ABBOTT: Mac?COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.ABBOTT: What about Windows?COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?ABBOTT: Wallpaper.COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.ABBOTT: Software for Windows?COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?ABBOTT: Office.COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything ?ABBOTT: I just did.COSTELLO: You just did what?ABBOTT: Recommend something.CO STELLO: You recommended something?ABBOTT: Yes.COSTELLO: For my office?ABBOTT: YesCOSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?ABBOTT: Office.COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?ABBOTT: Word.COSTELLO: What word?ABBOTT: Word in Office.COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue ‘W’.COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue ‘w’ if you don’t start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?ABBOTT: Money.COSTELLO: That’s right What do you have?ABBOTT: Money.COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?ABBOTT: Money.COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?ABBOTT: One copy.COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!(A few days later)ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?ABBOTT: Click on ‘START’ …

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