I’m trying out a new feature on The X Blog. I give you a news story and you provide the Republican Spin for the story.
In today’s story, some Pabst Blue Ribbon swigging hipster spilled frozen yogurt on the President of the United States. From the Washington Post:
During an unscheduled stop at a restaurant and bar here late Tuesday, President Obama ordered a pizza, shook hands, posed for pictures, bought some t-shirts — and got some yogurt spilled on his pants by an enthusiastic fan. … On his way to a speech to about 10,000 people at the University of Colorado, the president wiped his pants clean with a towel, made a quip about the Secret Service and said to the woman responsible for the spill: “Getting yogurt on the president, you’ve got a story to tell.”
Go …
What’s wrong, couldn’t find a real American with some potato salad to “spill” for this “accident” that was obviously staged by the liberal MSM?
Protestors infuriated by increased government regulations for the dairy industry threw yogurt on President Obama during a campaign stop in Colorado. The president laughed off their desparate cries for smaller governemnt and increased dairy subsidies.
Yogurt on the President – Priceless.
For everything else there’s Mastercard !!!!
The actions of this liberal youth, disrespecting an American president, clearly highlight the severe damage done to the image of the Office of the President by Barack Hussein Obama and his war on our culture. President Obama took no action to correct this attack on the Office of the President! He instead seemed to encourage such actions quote, “Getting yogurt on the president, you’ve got a story to tell.”
Up next, are frozen yogurt shops an affront to American Christians? We’ve got a round table discussion with S.E. Cupp and David Barton right after this!
Was that the stain really caused by “yoghurt”?
Some people are saying the President visited the restroom with a young male student moments before the stain was first noticed. It’s also been reported that the student is on an exchange program and hails originally from Colombia where he is said to have links with a number of the prostitutes involved in the Secret Service scandal.
Now we don’t know for a fact what happened in that restroom, so let’s not jump to conclusions. But we do know that the Evil Communist Muslim Atheist Obama is waging a war on traditional family values. So we wonder:
Did he offer some kind of “apology” for his Agents’ recent misdemeanors to this strapping young male student of latino descent?
Did the President have a personal interest in repealing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”?
Is Obama a GAY Muslim Atheist Foreign-Born Communist?
We report, you decide.
Socialized yogurt!
or
President Steals Yogurt from unnamed victim
Obama is waging a war on yogurt!!!!
To be fair, at least he had the decency to let the woman stain his clothes.
I am not that witty, but I have one comment. How long will it take for one of these ‘true’ stories about the yogurt incident will end up in Republican voter email inboxes as a ‘real’ true story….
Today, a true American Patriot gallantly blasted Kenyan Usurper Barack Hussein Obama with American-made yogurt in an attempt to bring awareness to the socialist outsourcing of yogurt manufacturing to Godless foreigners. He was instantly disappeared by Hussein Obama’s jackbooted Secret Service thugs. An anonymous source told Fox News, “I don’t have any ‘facts’ or ‘information’ to back this up, but I strongly believe that he was taken to a concentration camp and is being brainwashed to be an athiest [sic] Muslim homosexual by Obama’s Kenyan-made socialist robots!” When asked for comment, Hussein Obama said, “I just want you all to know that I hate Jesus and America, and if you re-elect me, I will take away your guns and rape your dogs. Thank you, and Satan Damn America.”
This “president” apparently is more concerned about his clothes than regular Americans. Proof? Well, let’s look at this woman he bumped into at a campaign stop. Not only did he not ask if she was okay, but his first response was about the state of his suit. Where did he get this suit, I wonder? And who paid for it?
And where was the Secret Service during all of this? Off with more prostitutes? Why is Obama paying his agents to solicit sex workers, I wonder? And who is paying for that? That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, you and I, the American taxpayers. We’re paying for the Secret Service to have sex while Barack Hussein Obama is bumping people to the floor because he’s in too much of a hurry to his next fundraiser.
(Wow, that was hard to type)
Today on Fox and Friends, we will explore possible sexual harassment charges against President Obama. Earlier today the president was at a photo op, when a young lady accidentally ran into the president. After the accident the president supposedly groped the young lady as she was trying to adjust herself following the collision. Witnesses to the incident report the young lady involved mentioned being “shocked that the president seemed more interested in the yogurt on his pants rather than her well-being.”
Sources close to the president are currently attempting to spin this harassment, as a harmless accident, but we at Fox are suspicious to say the least. We will keep you up to date as this incident unfolds.
Later on that evening…
Today on the O’Reilly Factor, Liberals have declared “War on Women!” Sources are reporting today that the president is currently facing sexual harassment charges after an incident earlier today. The young lady involved reported being quote, “shocked and appalled” at the president’s behavior. After spending months pretending that Conservatives are out to get women, it’s ironic that it would be the president who would actually fire the first shot in the Liberal “War on Women.” Fox news will keep you informed as the liberal media is sure to try to spin this incident as nothing more than a simple accident. Stay tuned to the O’Reilly Factor as we keep the liberal bias from clouding this story as it develops.