There are no switches in the human brain. “Switch” is a bit of a metaphor. This may not conflict with your idea of “forces outside oruselves” …. though I’d suggest different terminology because that could lead so easily to abrogation of responsibility.

We hear something on TV about how people on the planet are struggling to survive without water, but then we leave our tap running without a second thought. Why would we do that? … well, they can’t have that water anyway … may be it does not matter what you do with your tap, but rather, what companies your retirement is invested in and what they are doing to the water in the country to cause workers or peasants to struggle for access to water … There are influences all around us..we form habits that become ingrained. … Peircian! I like that.

Some of these influences have been bombarding us for decades longer than our lifetimes. Some of them are a powerful influence for rape and attitudes towards rape.

Absolutely. This whole series of posts on rape happened initially because of the Rape Awareness project addressing “cultures of rape” in war torn countries.

After all, grown ups only asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up. The primary concern was with how we were going to survive and support ourselves.

Good point! We should be asking children “what are you going to do to save the world when you grow up”

Anyway, yes, you’re talking about culture and I think you are essentially correct. You should start a blog.

For me, a long term sufferer from the effects of rape, and an equally long studier of rape in an attempt to understand it, and try to find some answers to it, I’ve come to some quite dooming conclusions. Actually they are not new..I keep hearing echos of feminist writers, although that was not the way I explored this issue.

For me rape goes beyond the “he/she”. WE are all subject to forces outside ourselves. Sometimes we don’t even notice those forces, like we have tax taken out of our pay and we don’t even question whether it is right for our labour to be taxed. We hear something on TV about how people on the planet are struggling to survive without water, but then we leave our tap running without a second thought. Why would we do that? There are influences all around us..we form habits that become ingrained.

Some of these influences have been bombarding us for decades longer than our lifetimes. Some of them are a powerful influence for rape and attitudes towards rape.

If you are business person you don’t go into business to make NO money. If you are politician you don’t go into politics so that you don’t get noticed and have no influence. These are big players. Large corporations and politics.

If you are going to work to make money, or to make your mark in the political world, you don’t always think about the wider influences on ordinary people, or the long term implications of those influences on the world. After all, grown ups only asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up. The primary concern was with how we were going to survive and support ourselves.

Some would argue that the women’s movement have come a long way since women first got the vote and in some ways we have, but rape hangs around to remind us that actually we have a hell of a long way to go before we can solve this one. Forgive me whilst I focus on the predominantly men rape women thing. Of course I realise that men get raped too, and that women can in a way rape men, and that not all men rape.

Predominantly men rape. Predominantly it is a male issue to be addressed. We can help as many victims as we want, but it does not deal with men and the influences upon them.

We know loads about the influences on women: If you’re slim, dress this way, use this beauty product, and walk like this, then you are real acceptable woman, blah blah bleughh! (that last one was bulemia).

We know these things because they come at us as women in adverts, in films, and magazines, and shops (you have to be the right size to fit). Industries take no account of anyone else but their marketting target. Big business has some immeasurable part to play in the influences upon us. The Advertising, Film and TV, and magazine Industries are amongst the biggest. So huge and so apparently normal that be barely notice it as we buy our next round of lipstick.

It is just as huge on men. How is it that many men haven’t noticed the way they are influenced, and protest about it? How come when many men hear about women being trafficked or raped, that they arn’t so outraged that they come together to take decisive action against these other men that give them such bad press? Men can have a very positive influence on stopping rape, but many just don’t want to. There is immeasurable influence on men, to be ‘real acceptable men’. I’m ashamed to say that even amongst my closest male friends, some believe it’s not they’re problem, and some think that actually rape isn’t so bad compared to what men go through in life. But they are the first to complain that women tar all men with the same brush. Men actually tar men with the same brush.

The media industry is a system that works when it comes to maintaining the status quo. It’s big bucks. Politicians can feel proud of such big industries that feed the economy, and that they can rely on. Politicians are not about to threaten such industries buy puting human atrocities in their own country at the top of the agenda, especially when it predominantly affects women.

I am heartened that men all over the world are at last beginning to stand up and form groups that speak out against violence towards women…or more PC, Gender Based Violence. England is a stiff ol’ bird and is slow to catch up.

I could have said all this in two words..patriarchal systems..but it’s feminist language, and I would rather present my opinions in my own words.

Anyway, my point is that the powerful influences that surround us must not be under estimated when it comes to tackling rape. It’s not all just part of some personality. Even if societal influence is only part of the problem, it is also part of the solution.

Thank you for posting. You have provided me with insight that I know cost you emotionally.

Something happened to me once which caused PTSD. I know it may never be cured, but I have gotten assistance to learn to live with it better. Yes, it still causes me problems.

[I can’t tell…], have you ever gritted your teeth at one of the most insensitive, stupid phrases a person can say to someone like you: “Do you have closure yet?” I think it is one of the most ignorant things a well meaning person can say. What does the phrase even mean?

_____
I returned to this posting to see if the thread had picked up. Rape sours our society and we should be discussing and trying to eliminate (or at least reduce) it. One problem is people like Paul Murray (comment above). He is an example of the apathetic shoulder shruggers common in our society who see trying to correct a wrong as too much effort.

Another problem are Teabaggers (I use the word, not as members of a political party, but for anyone who proposes meanness or greed as a political answer).

They are trying to take us backwards in our thought about rape. Suggesting those raped pay for their own rape kits for forensic purposes. Are the families of murdered people forced to pay for blood spatter analysis?

Your story is very sad, and I’m sorry this has happened to you. You can get help to get father past this than you are now. You should do that.

I have a tendency, when I write a comment to be somewhat long winded. What you see is a product I have gone over, deleting parts & rewriting parts to make it shorter and easier to read. When I comment I always keep in mind that a few will misunderstand, read words that are not there and assume, because I didn’t add it to the comment, I didn’t think of it.

My comments are long enough without having to inoculate against every readers reactions.

And you are aware that recounting experiences tends to make things worse, not better?

When I wrote about testifying in court being a tough time for the victim, I guess I should have left in the paragraph about recounting (reliving) the rape in a public place, maybe in front of a smirking attacker, but I talked about recounting the rape details in a supportive atmosphere later in the comment. I left out a sentence pointing out that recounting a rape experience would be trail prep. I figured most people would deduce that thought without me taking up more space.

As for consciousness-raising: yes, absolutely. Whether making a blanket accusation of rape against every man on campus is a good way of doig this or not, I am not sure. Its worthwhile remembering that feminist groups, like every group, have as their main goal self-perpetuation.

I started to think intoxicants when I saw this quote. You took an anecdote I wrote in a separate post, an example of what I thought was wrong, and juxtaposed it with an unrelated thought in a different comment.

God, again with the warz. aren’t there enough wars on abstract concepts and reifications concepts going around?

I used the word ‘war’ maybe twice in that comment. If it is that unacceptable to you, please suggest an alternate word. By the way, rape is not an abstract concept.

Absolutely. The system works badly – everyone knows it, and there’s just about nothing that can be done about it. Because they are disposing peoples freedom, the people in the system have to be meticulous.

I guess I am not ready to give up on tough problems.

I will let your other misconceptions pass. The readers can decide whose logic is better.

One of the soldiers, Lynndie England, was a young woman who joined in the worst of the atrocities, the nature of some I define as rape.

I rather like this move to stop using the word “rape” and start using “sexual battery”. At least in law.

Victims were treated horribly. They were ignored and not informed when their case changed status. They would appear in court over and over to hear the judge postpone the case – delay is to the defense’s advantage

Yes, this is very standard. The way that justice gets done in our system, where you have a “day in court” to argue things before a judge, and on that day all of your ducks have to be absolutely in a row, is utterly broken. The people are often good, the sytem itself is very, very awful.

When the victim does have her day in court; she experiences the emotional strain of having her attacker sit and stare at her as she testifies.

Well, yes. Everyone gets put through the wringer in a criminal case. The only people that perhaps dont are hardened criminals and the court itself, for whom this is just another day in court.

If the attorney finds out the attacker and the victim had any contact prior to the crime (even if she only served him coffee once in a cafe), he/she will try to convince a jury they knew each other well and say the rape accusation was post coital regrets.

Well, yeah. Defense lawyers attempt to defend their clients. Their clients, after all, have been accused of a serious crime – what on earth would you expect? I’m surprised to find that this sort of information is not supposed to be brought up. False accuastions of rape happen all the time. I am rather getting the impression that this poster would only be satisfied with a system whereby a woman and point the finger, yell “rapist” and the man goes straight to gaol forever.

Not much is done to protect or help the victim before, during or after the trial.

No shit. The courts and the “justice” system see it as their main job to keep the perp from doing it again to someone else. They are not a counseling or psychiatric service.

If the rapist is acquitted, the victim is seen as a liar or worse

Again … what else would you expect? People do indeed tend to assume that a person acquitted of a crime is innocent. It’s kind of what the word means.

I think the first action in the war on rapists is to protect the victims. Provide physical, financial and psychological support. Give victims a safe, supportive atmosphere to recount their extremely stressful experiences.

God, again with the warz. aren’t there enough wars on abstract concepts and reifications concepts going around?

And you are aware that recounting experiences tends to make things worse, not better?

Streamline the court process. Ensure the rights of the accused, however stop the ‘gaming’ of the court system so justice is speedy and fair.
Stop the heavy reliance on plea bargaining.

Absolutely. The system works badly – everyone knows it, and there’s just about nothing that can be done about it. Because they are disposing peoples freedom, the people in the system have to be meticulous. Altering the way things get done is trickier than heart surgery, because in heart surgery you basically put things back more-or-less the way you found them.

As for consciousness-raising: yes, absolutely. Whether making a blanket accusation of rape against every man on campus is a good way of doig this or not, I am not sure. Its worthwhile remembering that feminist groups, like every group, have as their main goal self-perpetuation.